I Don't Understand

I'm receiving mixed signals.

Just December last year, Phoebe received an Edusave Award certificate which is only meant for the top 25% of the whole P1 cohort, that would mean that she should be about at least the top 10% of her class. In addition, her report book gleamed with As for all her components and she had been getting full marks or at least close to full marks for all her test in class. For her Show and Tell, she was confident in her presentation and her MT teacher commented that she was great in Show and Tell.

However, during Meet Parent/Principal Session, her form teacher kept saying that Phoebe was not confident, she is lost when comes to school work. The form teacher assigned a "Small Teacher" for her and she kept asking me not to help her in her work and let her try on her own. She kept saying that : You are a teacher, you should know.

However, in her daily homework, phoebe did all the work by herself without me helping her. Then I will usually checked for her when she has completed. When comes to questions that are tough, she would ask me and I would explained it to her before she attempt again. What's wrong with this process? I cannot totally not check her work or not go through it with her right? After all, she's only 8 years old, she needs our guidance and that's what we adults are here for.

Then just last night, Phoebe showed me a letter saying that she had to go for remedial classes for Math and English. She was very sad and she told me that those who were selected to attend the remedial classes were classmates like LM, Joxxxxx, Naxxxx, Haxxxx etc and these children are no good in their work and then she added softly that : That means I'm v bad, I'm no good in my work too. That's why I need to go for remedial class. Chloe is very smart. She's the smartest and everyone likes to go recess with her.'

When I heard her saying that, it really broke my heart... I was so sad. What has happened to my happy girl? Has school made her become low esteemed? She's always a well-behaved girl, always obedient in class and obliging. Even when she doesn't like or want certain things, she would just smile and swallow her emotions so that others will not feel bad. That is my lovely girl, very considerate and obliging.

I tried to comfort her, saying that it's ai small group, you can get to know your teacher better, you can chit chat with her and even help her. Children adore their teacher and phoebe was kind of smiling again. But at the back of my mind, I was thinking :

Is my daughter that bad? My own class of P2 are worse! If she, being part of the top 25% needs to go for remedial classes, then what about the rest of her friends who are below the 25% bar, wouldnt they need to go for remedial classes too? Unless the teacher is saying that she needs to help phoebe to unleash her potential??

Honestly, I don't mind phoebe going for the remedial classes at all. To me, it's free and extra lessons, why not? And small group is definitely beneficial!! :) however what I'm concerned with is phoebe's self esteem. I don't want her to think that she's no good coz as it is, she's already saying that! I'm also concern with the teacher's perception of her. The children adore their teachers hence the teacher's words carry a lot of weight.

I'm just praying that God will intercede for phoebe and bless her with favour and wisdom. My beloved daughter, mommy's heart is all for you. I can't see or do anything, but I can only lift you up to God and submit you to Him totally. I trust that God's hand will be with you always and walk with you all the day's of your life. With all my love for you, mommy.