Love and Dislike Relationship

Sometimes they like to play with each other and they can play together for an hour or more. But sometimes, they scream at each other, fighting for the same toy or book. They have a Love and Dislike relationship. I wouldn't use the word "hate" at all because they clearly love each other.

There was once I was very angry with Reuben because he was throwing tantrum and being very unreasonable. We were just trying to be helpful and we opened his Thomas umbrella for him. However, Reuben did not understand or appreciate our help because he wanted to open the umbrella himself. We closed the umbrella again and let him do it himself but it was too late. He was already upset, over such a trivial matter!! We were on our way to "Little Learners". Phoebe was with us to take Reuben to school because it was school holidays for her. The last straw that broke the camel's back was when Reuben threw his Thomas umbrella on the pavement near Little Learners. I was very mad with him. I told him to pick it up but he refused, very stubbornly. We stood at the pavement for almost 10 mins and he was crying and whining all the while but yet refused to pick the umbrella up. I decided to walked away, though my maid was standing near to Reuben. I beckoned Nia to come with me and let the little boy be there by himself while he continued to cry and stamp him feet. When I walked away, pulling Phoebe with me, Phoebe burst into tears. She said, "Reuben !! Reuben !! Mommy don't go. He's my brother!! He's my brother!!" She was crying so sadly. At that moment, I was very touched. My girl is an emotional person. She's also very soft-hearted. Whenever, we read a nice emotional book, I can see that she was touched. There was once we read a storybook about a grandma passing away, after reading the book, I asked her, "Do you like this book?" and she was very quiet. She replied, "Yes, it's a little bit touching. I think of mama (grandma)."

Anyway, back to Reuben throwing tantrum. In the end, he still did not pick up the umbrella. I scooped him up and told him that when we reached grandma's house, I'll give him a stroke of the cane. He was screaming at the top of his lungs and struggling as I carried him to grandma's place. When I got home, Phoebe had calmed down. I re-enacted the scene and put the umbrella on the floor and told Reuben to pick the umbrella up. He refused. I gave him a hard stroke. He was still crying. I repeated my sentence and that was, to pick the cane up. He refused. I laid my threat out - If he would not pick the cane up within 3 counts, I would give him another stroke. I counted to 2 and he relented. All these while, my dad was with me, persuading Reuben to pick the umbrella up. I refused to allow Reuben to run to my dad for refuge and I must thank my dad for being there to stand by me. We all believe in sparing the rod and spoiling the child. Of course, to use the rod sparingly and appropriately each time. After Reuben had picked the umbrella up, my dad "sayang" him and instantly, they became best friends!! :) Reuben found comfort in Gong-gong.

I think I have deviated from my original topic. But clearly, it shows that Phoebe loves her brother a lot and would watch out for him and would refused to leave him behind. THAT is a sister's love for her brother!! :) As a mother, I'm very happy about it! :)

In picture 1, they quarrelled with each other, both were angry. They had to settle the dispute themselves, unless there was violent involved, then I would intervene.
In picture 2 and 3, they ganged up against me, both were angry with mommy :)